Saturday, August 22, 2009

NEWS: Twitch - Beware The Furious Foliage! It’s Jason Eisener’s TREEVENGE!

Here is Jason Eisener shortfilm Treevenge: An arborist's nightmare, the coniferous revenge film turned the tables on everyone's favorite holiday season by re-casting the humble Christmas Tree as the angry victim of an annual genocide with the time arriving to take revenge on the wielders of the axe.

Treevenge is a blood soaked, splattery affair that provoked enormous reactions on the festival circuit, racking up awards by the armful as it screened at Sundance, Fantastic Fest, Fantasia, Toronto After Dark and too many others to name. The only problem was that there was no way for audiences to actually see the damn thing outside of those festival appearances, with only a short clip available online.

Until now! Watch it here by clicking the link below!

Thursday, August 20, 2009

NEWS: Japanese movie Grotesque banned in UK!

You are not going to believe this! Distributors of the film Grotesque (which involves torture such as amputation and eye-gouging) is said by the BBFC (British Board of Film Classification) that the film features sexual sadism. It said that giving the film a rating would involve a "risk of harm" to those viewing it. So, in other words - Selling or supplying the film would now be illegal! The decision was taken by BBFC director, David Cooke and senior colleagues.

The board said the majority of the film focused on the assault, humiliation and torture of two victims. The main character takes them prisoner, restrains, strips and sexually assaults them before inflicting horrific injuries until they die. This is truly ridiculous!

Wednesday, August 19, 2009

REVIEW: Chainsaw Cheerleaders (2008)

Title: Chainsaw Cheerleaders
Also known as: N/A
Year: 2008
Genre: Comedy / Horror / Independent
Language: English
Runtime: 88 min
Director: Donald Farmer
Writer: Donald Farmer
IMDb: N/A



Plot:
Dawn is a 17 year old rebelling girl, who just found out her boyfriend has been dating behind her back. When things just continue to go bad, her rage makes her parents sick of he, so they send her off to become a cheerleader. When trying to fit in with the other girls, things seem to be going worse. A witch travels 500 years, to our time, and possesses one of the other cheerleaders, and soon Dawn is the only one who can stop the witch.

Our thoughts:
I've been waiting a long time for this film and I finally got my hands on it. From the title, you pretty much know what to except, 'cause I can't really remember a film that has had "cheerleader" in the title, and hasn't been a cheesy trash cinema. "Chainsaw Cheerleaders" is exactly that.

Plotwise it's interesting at times. Donald Farmer clearly put some thought into it, but most of the time the plot is either too out there, or our mind drifts away so we can't concentrate on anything else than the pictures on the screen rather than dialogue and explainations. The film starts off with scenes from year 1508, and I've always had a bit of a problem with low budget films having scenes showing old times. Luckily there isn't much focus on getting the "feel" of 1508, except for the clothes they were wearing, so it's not hard for it to be believable enough. When we're back to our time, we follow Dawn's little journey to becoming a..well, chainsawing cheerleader. It takes about an hour before the film starts to let out a notable amount of nudity and blood, and I guess that's both good and bad. The film was alot more funny before it all started, but then again it got a bit more entertaining when we get some blood and titties. I guess I could weigh the pro's and con's of the two halfs of the film, but let's just say that both are needed for the film to work. Like I mentioned earlier, there were alot of times where I found myself thinking of anything but the film, while just looking at the moving pictures on my television. I found the film to drag a bit, and some things were just not needed in there. The thing that I liked the most in here would probably be the stereotypical cheerleaders and the stupid things that they say. There wasn't much more comedy than those scenes either really.

The film is very typical as far as ultra cheesy independent splatter comedies go, and if you're a fan of those, this is a perfect film for you. I used to be alot more into these films about 5 years ago or so, because now I always seem to be needing that little extra to truely enjoy them, which I didn't find in this one. Like how "Bone Sickness" has awesome zombies and tons of splatter, but still being about as independent and at times cheesy as "Chainsaw Cheerleaders" is. Technical flaws like how the chainsaws are never really on in the film, or that we in a throat cutting scene can see that there's no actual cut, aren't the biggest flaws in the film at all. The problem was just that it didn't pull me in enough, and the jokes were too few or just not my taste.

Positive things:
- The stupid cheerleaders gave me a few giggles.
- Decent CGI for what it is.
- Pretty girls.
- Boobies. This never stops being a positive thing in my reviews.
- Atleast it stands above films like "TrashHouse". Not much comfort, but it's something.

Negative things:
- Did the leading girl really have to be such a typical "goth" girl? If they were gonna make her goth, couldn't they have let her be a real goth rather than a poor-black-make-up-and-Marilyn Manson-listening-goth?
- Not funny or special enough.

Rating:
Gore: 1.5/5
Nudity: 2/5
Story: 3/5
Effects: 1.5/5
Comedy: 3/5

We got this movie from:

It can be bought from:

Reviewed by:
Ronny




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Saturday, August 15, 2009

NEWS: £45 zombie movie gets UK cinema release

The zombie film Colin made for a total of £45 (yupp, you heard me) is being launched in UK cinemas days ahead of its DVD release.

Colin is written and directed by first-time filmmaker Marc Price, and are a horror film penned over three months during his job at a London courier firm, The Guardian reports.

He says: "I had been a fan of Romero's films but I didn't have the money to copy them. I knew my only hope was to find a new angle. Then it hit me: why not do a movie from the point of view of a zombie? We went on Facebook and MySpace and said, 'Who wants to be a zombie?' We managed to get 50 brilliantly made-up zombies and stuff them into a living room. The lead character is named after my dad. He is a steelworker and it was his love of movies that first inspired me to think about making films."

Colin was shot on borrowed equipment and recovered tapes before being shown at Cannes, leading to a distribution deal and its upcoming nationwide release on October 23.



See the trailer here!

Tuesday, August 11, 2009

REVIEW: Guinea Pig: Devil's Experiment (1985)

Title: Guinea Pig: Devil's Experiment
Also known as:
Guinea Pig
Za ginipiggu: Akuma no jikken
Year: 1985
Genre: Torture / Fake Snuff / Mockumentary
Language: Japanese
Runtime: 43 min
Director: Satoru Ogura
Writer: N/A



Plot:
Three guys has a girl captured to perform experiments in the form of torture on her, to see how much her body and mind can take.

Our thoughts:
This movie is all about torture, there is no plot, and there is nothing else happening what so ever. And hey, I'm not complaining! The experiments that are performed are very cruel and the perpetrators show no mercy. Some of the experiments they do on her is hitting her face with their hands, hitting her with a bag of coins, pinching her skin with a claw till it turns blue, pulling off nails and playing extremely loud noises in headphones for 20 hours,
to name a few. But none of those can compare to the final scene; the infamous needle scene.

It's obvious that this short film is made to shock, and that they worked hard to make it look realistic. While it does shock at times, there are a few scenes that feel very unrealistic. There are two things that comes to mind when I'm talking about it's realism. The first one is that the girl truely sucks at making screams sound real, most of the times they just sound stupid. The second one is the fact that the movie is filmed in different angles. Luckily, the shock value in this movie often works even with those flaws dragging it down. There are scenes that look close to a 100% real too, especially the needle scene I mentioned above. Gotta give the series some credits since it got Charlie Sheen to believe it ("Flower Of Flesh And Blood") was real, so he tried to sue. Of course he failed.

I don't have alot more to say about this movie, because there isn't much more to it, but every review needs a few final words, so here they are.
Alot of people didn't like this movie because they expected much more, so my advice is that if you are going to check this out, don't buy into all the rumors. This movie won't make you sick, but there is violent enough things in it to make you feel dirty. Don't watch this movie if you want gore, watch the second Guinea Pig movie instead, titled "Guinea Pig: Flowers Of Flesh And Blood".

Positive things:
- Does what it was made to do.
- Nice effects.
- Very good ideas on how to torture a person.
- The needle scene. I just love it.

Negative things:
- The girl.
- Several camera angles.
- The guts experiment. It was just ridiculous.
- Gets boring at times.

Rating:
Gore: 2/5
Nudity: 0/5
Story: 0.5/5
Effects: 3.5/5
Comedy: 0/5

We bought this movie from:

Reviewed by:
Ronny




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Sunday, August 9, 2009

REVIEW: Gorotica (1993)

Title: Gorotica
Also known as: Wake Of The Dead
Year: 1993
Genre: Independent / Necrophilia / Crime
Language: English
Runtime: 60 min
Director: Hugh Gallagher
Writer: Hugh Gallagher
IMDb: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0107038/


Plot:
One of two bank robbers swallows a stolen diamond and then gets killed. Then the other robber, Neil, takes the body to a cemetery, where he happens to meet Carrie. Carrie helps him leave before the cops can get him. Carrie happens to be a necrophile who starts to screw around with his dead friend, and he tries to convince the people who hired them that the diamond is in a safe place.

Our thoughts:
What can you expect from a film that starts out with a girl who touches herself while watching death photos on the TV? You can expect a good time, that's for sure! I love sick low budget films, and while this might not have the most exciting plot and it's not overly gory, it's still obscure enough to appeal to a sickophant like man.

I think what kept me hooked the entire film was the introduction scene where she does that. Why? Well, frankly, because it was a fairly hot scene. The movie continues by following the two bank robbers, Neil and Max, who has just robbed a bank for a large diamond. As they try to hide from the cops, Max comes up with the oh so brilliant idea that he should swallow the diamond, because then they can just walk down the streets like nothing. So he does that, but gets shot to death the second after. Neil eventually ends up with the body at Carrie's apartment. Carrie is the introduction girl, the necrophile, and probably the thing that keeps the film interesting. It doesn't take long before she starts to mess around with the body (that they currently are keeping in the bathtub). Even this time it's pretty hot. I might not be a fan of her sacky boobs, but she's a decent actress and makes the scene work. Back to Neil, who is trying to contact the people who hired him to steal the diamond. He tries to get some money out of them in advance to travel. And that's basicly what this film is, a criminal / necrophile film. A nice and odd mix that I think worked great. There's room for improvment, plenty of room, but it has enough to never be boring, and like I said, the plot mix works great. Take either away from the other and you're looking at a pretty damn boring film.

What really puts this film into a category of it's own as far as ultra cheap trashy shot-on-video films goes is the acting. It's surprisingly well acted. Of course, you need to compare it with other films like this for it to really shine, but I think it could beat some of the classic horror films we all grew up with. Let's face it, they don't always have great acting. I know that one of my all time favorites, "Demons", has some terrible acting.

And then we have the special effects. We sadly don't have buckets of intestines and blood. There's not too much gore, but what we have looks fine. Especially on a crappy quality bootleg like this. We also have some great looking corpses. People made up as corpses, to be exact. Even the actors who are playing dead in this film are good, and I think this is what makes the necrophile scenes so good, if that's the right thing to call it. I can't help but compare necrophile films with the mother of necrophile films, "Nekromantik", and that's the case here too. The scene in the bathtub especially reminded me of some scenes in that and the sequel. If you like "Nekromantik", you should enjoy these scenes too.

I try not to judge films like these too hard, because you kinda know what you're gonna get when you sit down to watch them. In this case, even being a little judgemental can make this stand as a pretty cool obscure flick. It's raw, dirty, erotic, fairly sexy, and the plot might not impress but it kept me interested. If your favorite film is "Cloverfield" and the sickest film you know is "Saw", then yeah, skip this one. This film shouldn't be watched by some spoiled little brat like you. If you enjoy "Nekromantik", or just any extreme film, maybe even just classics like "Maniac", give it a shot.


Positive things:
- Great acting for being what it is.
- Yes, I thought some of the scenes were pretty sexy.

Negative things:
- Could've been gorier.
- She had sort of sacky tits.

Rating:
Gore: 1/5
Nudity: 3/5
Story: 2/5
Effects: 3/5
Comedy: 1/5

We bought this movie from:
N/A

Reviewed by:
Ronny




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Saturday, August 8, 2009

REVIEW: Special Dead (2006)

Title: Special Dead
Also Known As: N/A
Year: 2006
Genre: Horror / Comedy / Zombie / Tardsploitation
Language: English
Runtime: 90 min
Director: Thomas L. Phillips, Sean Simmons
Writer: Jared Tweedie


Plot:
When a zombie plague infects Camp Special Dude, a dude ranch for the mentally handicapped, a ragtag band of campers and counselors struggles to survive the night. Led by the indifferent, nunchuck-wielding head counselor, Mac Stone (Jason Brubaker), and his wheelchair-bound sister Dale (Gia Natale), the unlikely heroes fight their way off the mountain as, one by one, they’re picked off and join the ranks of the walking dead.

It’s a campy stampede of blood, boobs and gore as some “very special” people show that they can kick some serious undead ass.

Our thoughts:
What’s better than a movie filled with mentally challenged zombies? Nothing, that’s what.

“Well what about…”

No! Don’t argue with me, you’ll lose.

Any movie that has a zombie screaming profanities while it tears into flesh because of turrets, is an instant classic. This movie is the definitive argument for those who say there are no original ideas left, not only does it provide a unique situation of having the characters be a group of handicapped teens. It also provides a fresh idea into the zombie mythology by having water be the source of the outbreak. Don't start freaking out, I didn't spoil anything for you, you find this out within the first few minutes of the movie.

The thing that really makes this movie shine is its sense of humor. Once again, a movie that lets the absurdity of the idea be the joke, sure the movie gets silly and has its ridiculous moments, but it isn't being campy for the sake of being campy. The creators of "Special Dead", handle the humor of having mentally-challenged characters correctly, this isn't a one-note joke for 90 minutes. Instead the movie treats them as if they were no different from any other kids at camp, though they do use the unique setup to provide for some more humorous situations. Such as having one of the kids do an impersonation of someone who is really retarded, or when an urban gangster accidentally shows up at the camp, no one questions about him being there.

As far as blood goes, by my standards I really don't consider this to be a gory movie. Don't worry though, there is plenty of blood to go around. There are at least two decapitations, some guts here and there, but the blood comes in by the buckets, which should be enough to satisfy any horror fan. Oh yes, there is also plenty of zombie action going on here. It does take its time setting up the story and the characters in the beginning, but once those zombies hit the camp, the action doesn't stop until the very end. With the zombie scenes you are given the best of both worlds, you get the classic style of zombies popping out of the dark, and some humorous situations with them too. Have any other characters in a zombie movie, ever thought of throwing a bucket of blood and chicken guts on a zombie, so all the other zombies go after that one? No? Well these kids sure did.

All in all, an absolute gem in the low budget horror-comedy world. It has a good story, zombies, blood and some decent acting, which will provide enough entertainment for an individual or a room full of people who'll be spouting off quotes for days. Most importantly though, "Special Dead" answers a question that has been asked since the beginning of time. If two women get into a cat fight, and start wrestling each other, is it still hot if one of them is a zombie?

Yes. Yes it is.

Positive things:
- A unique concept with excellent execution.
- Surprisingly, has some good to decent acting.
- Everything a horror movie needs; zombies, blood and boobs.
- Lots of memorable lines.
- Does a zombie shit in the woods?

Negative things:
- The movie takes place at night so unfortunately somethings become hard to see with the lack of lighting.

Rating:
Gore: 3/5
Nudity: 1/5
Story: 5/5
Effects: 3/5
Comedy: 5/5

We bought this movie from:

Reviewed by:
Preston




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Friday, August 7, 2009

REVIEW: Hitch-Hike (1977)

Title: Hitch-Hike
Also known as:
"Autostop rosso sangue" (Original title)
"Death Drive" (UK) (video title)"
"Hitchhike: Last House on the Left" (USA) (video title)
The Naked Prey" (USA)
Year: 1977
Genre: Crime / Exploitation / Thriller / Road Movie
Language: Italian / English (dubbed)
Runtime: 104 min / 82 min (Canada) / 98 min (UK)
Director: Pasquale Festa Campanile
Writer: Peter Kane (novel), Aldo Crudo (screen treatment), and more.


Plot:
A woman and her angry drunk husband is on a road trip cross the country when their vacation soon turns to a nightmare on wheels. They pick up a hitcher (played by David Hess), who at first seems like a charming young man, but as time reveals, he's a sex obsessed robber on the run who needs transport to Mexico.

Our thoughts:
Of course I had to check this film out when I heard of it. I'm a fan of road movies, 'cause they usually guarantee a fun time, or atleast some kind of entertainment, and from what I had heard, this was one of the better out there. Why would this be so much better?

"Hitch-Hike" is in many ways a very ordinary hitcher film, but it's more of a exploitation and sleaze film than I would say that "The Hitcher" is. The terror starts out as any other, but with David Hess being the villain, we're already expecting some nasty rape. The film takes alot, and I mean alot of turns through-out, and most of them are expected, but we are, however, often thinking "Wow, they actually pulled that card". Sometimes the turns work really good, even though they tried hard to make us surprised. The turns bring alot of extra to the film, since it never becomes "the same old". We have a fantastic car chase, great nudity, David Hess rape scenes, villains vs. villains, and anything else you could wish for in a road film.

It's not a gory film but it has one particularly good head shot. It does satisfy in terms of nudity though. The woman is very good looking, and we're excited every time we get to see her showing off her boobers.

It might not be as harsch as it's prequel "The Last House On The Left", or even as scary as "The Hitcher", but as far as entertainment goes, this film packs a car full. Being a sequel to "The Last House On The Left", I would say that you shouldn't expect the same kind of film here. "Hitch-Hike" is, in all it's obvious twists and sometimes silliness, a very brilliant film, and you can't find a more fun ride if you're looking for a great road movie.

Positive things:
- The mix of hitcher film and exploitation film.
- David Hess.
- The girl is purdy.

Negative things:
- Some twists are silly, but to be honest, they do work.

Rating:
Gore: 3/5
Nudity: 0.5/5
Story: 3/5
Effects: 3/5
Comedy: 3/5

We bought this movie from:

Reviewed by:
Ronny






This review was brought to you by FilmBizarro.com. For more reviews visit:

Thursday, August 6, 2009

REVIEW: Razorback (1984)

Title: Razorback
Also known as: Kampfkoloss Der Hölle (Germany)
Year: 1984
Genre: Horror / Animal / Thriller
Language: English
Runtime: 95 min
Director: Russell Mulcahy
Writer: Peter Brennan (novel) & Everett De Roche (written by)


Plot:
Jake Cullen lives in the Austrailian outback and one night his house is attacked by a giant Razorback boar and his grandson is carried away with it and he dedicates his entire life to track that boar and kill it. Years a
fter this horrible event, an American TV-reporter falls victim to the very same boar, but no one knows what has happened to her. Her husband gets there to find the truth behind the death of his wife, and eventually joins forces with Jake Cullen and Jake's daughter to kill the huge bloodthirsty pig.

Our thoughts:
Horror movies about big animals.. We've all learned not to expect anything out of the ordinary from them, because most are bad. Doesn't matter if you find enjoyment in them or not, you can't say that the majority of them are good movies. There are of course a couple golden movies, most of them which are very famous, like Jaws and Jurassic Park, but I can't hide from the fear I get every time I'm gonna watch one I haven't seen. Razorback is a
movie that I've heard close to nothing about, I've only heard of it from a few people I know, and they all had very good things to say about it. This doesn't help my fear, but it made me interested in seeing the god damn thing. There is a slight chance that I only got interested because it was about a big swine though.

The plot itself might not be extraordinary, but but it actually didn't feel very cliché, even though we have our obvious bad guys who are "worse" than the monster (in this case, the Razorback), a vengeful old man no one believes, a man looking for answers on a missing person, and so on. There's also the obvious faults where the creature is way too smart, but if things like that annoy you, then you should never watch a horror movie again. The movie is set in the Austrailian outback, which makes it feel almost post-apocalyptic
at times, especially the scenes with the Baker brothers (the "bad guys") who dress odd and act barbaric. Yes, dressing odd can almost be considered a trademark of post-apocalyptic movies. That plus desert equals post-apocalypse. The movie has very beautiful visuals with wide open deserts, good use of different colors and interesting sets.

I saw someone was complaining about the acting in this film, and I have no idea why because I think it was pretty good, or even very good. Either it's just me who's been watching too many shitty acted and shitty overall movies like TrashHouse, or maybe I'm just better than those other people.

The special effects are great here, and that's something I always pray for in a
creature movie but rarely get. We only see glimpses of the Razorback and all of them look amazing. After all, we're talking about a big angry badass hog here, so there was a big chance that it could look like shit, but it didn't. I think it looked good enough to be shown alot more than it actually was, but it adds a tension and mystery to the film when we only see some parts at a time, much like with Jaws. There wasn't that much gore in the film except some dead animals, which is fine by me, and atleast that gore looks splendid. I think the death of the boar could've been alot more graphic however. A few special effects they could've left out was the lightning and the electricity charges towards the end. They didn't look good.

I was very surprised by this film, I did not expect to see one of the best animal horrors ever made when I put this in the DVD. It should be seen by any horror
fan, especially fans of the animal horrors. It's not a straight out horror movie though, it has alot of things that only should be called "thriller". It has clichés, but it uses them with perfection. It has great special effects, it's beautifully shot and it's never boring. Check it out.


Positive things:
- Jake Cullen. Badass old fart.
- Coolest movie with a big pig ever made.
- Wonderful special effects on the pig. If this was made
2008 it would be CGI and I'd prefer diarrhea over that.
- Uses the clichés in the best ways possible.

Negative things:
- Not that gory.
- Why don't I hear about this film every day?
- The death of the Razorback should've been more graphic.
- The lightning and the electricity charges.

Rating:
Gore: 1/5
Nudity: 0.5/5
Story: 3/5
Effects: 4/5
Comedy: 1.5/5

We bought this movie from:

Reviewed by:
Ronny





This review was brought to you by FilmBizarro.com. For more reviews visit:

Wednesday, August 5, 2009

REVIEW: The Dark (1994)

Title: The Dark
Also known as: N/A
Year: 1994
Genre: Horror
Language: English
Runtime: 87 min
Director: Craig Pryce
Writer: Robert C. Cooper



Plot:
A wanted scientist and a retired FBI agent are both looking for the same thing. An underground creature, currently living under a graveyard. The scientist needs the creature alive for research and the FBI agent wants to kill it for revenging his dead partner. When the creatures starts to pull down gravestones and steal the coffins for food, the people working at the graveyard starts to take notice of the being, and the hunt of the creature begins as soon as the two looking for it arrives. The biggest problem is that they have to go into the monsters dark tunnels to find it.

Our thoughts:
I had this film on VHS when I was a kid, and I remember that it went under the name "Mörker" here in Sweden. Many years later when I tried to find the film again, I thought the title would either be "Darkness" or something totally different (let's face it, sometimes countries translate titles into the weirdest things). Eventually I found the film under the title "The Dark", and was sad to see that it only had a VHS release. This is the second film with Robert C. Cooper as writer that doesn't have a DVD release, and the other film is "The Club" (another childhood film that I recently reviewed)

The film is full of clichés, typical flaws, obvious actions and consequences, and the plot tries harder than it has to. Two men looking for a creature for different personal reasons, and innocent people coming between their rivalry and the monster. I wouldn't have needed the revenge plot of the FBI agent, because it didn't really bring anything interesting to the table, so the scientists plot would've been just enough. In the film we also have two graveyard workers, and two cops (one who dies early on, and the other one being Neve Campbell). The monster was interesting enough though. It always stays under ground, and I liked that it stole coffins to eat the bodies inside. The film definitely should've focused alot more on the monster and not as much on the reasons why they are looking for it, if you ask me. We don't have too much creature action until towards the end, which is a huge minus here.

The creature looks very good, I was surprised by the effects, because they were alot better than I remembered, but it's also because IMDb has a picture of the wrong film, and the monster on that cover looks really stupid so I was kinda expecting that one. Anyway, the monster looks like a big rat-ish beast, resembling the aliens from "Bill & Ted's Bogus Journey" (I think that's the one they were in), except more dangerous and evil looking. The creature looks good enough for me to be a bit angry that they don't show it that often, and when they do it's usually in the dark.

We're not talking about a flawless film here, which I think you understand by now. It has many negative parts, not too good of a plot, and small flaws that can annoy. Like "Where are all the light sources in the dark underground tunnels coming from?". These are things that makes this film anything but extraordinary, but it's worth checking out if you want to watch an unknown monster film with decent FX, because there can never really be enough of those. There are so many worse films out there, and you're better off spending time on this than on most shithole movies coming out of Hollywood lately.

Positive things:
- Neve Campbell. Let's face it, she looks pretty good.
- Cool monster.
- Good monster effects.
- I like the idea of the monster living under the graveyard.
- "Gotta love the smell of death in the morning."

Negative things:
- Not on DVD.
- Far from perfect.

Rating:
Gore: 0.5/5
Nudity: 0.5/5
Story: 2/5
Effects: 3.5/5
Comedy: 2/5

We got this movie from:
N/A

Reviewed by:
Ronny




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