Saturday, August 22, 2009

NEWS: Twitch - Beware The Furious Foliage! It’s Jason Eisener’s TREEVENGE!

Here is Jason Eisener shortfilm Treevenge: An arborist's nightmare, the coniferous revenge film turned the tables on everyone's favorite holiday season by re-casting the humble Christmas Tree as the angry victim of an annual genocide with the time arriving to take revenge on the wielders of the axe.

Treevenge is a blood soaked, splattery affair that provoked enormous reactions on the festival circuit, racking up awards by the armful as it screened at Sundance, Fantastic Fest, Fantasia, Toronto After Dark and too many others to name. The only problem was that there was no way for audiences to actually see the damn thing outside of those festival appearances, with only a short clip available online.

Until now! Watch it here by clicking the link below!

Thursday, August 20, 2009

NEWS: Japanese movie Grotesque banned in UK!

You are not going to believe this! Distributors of the film Grotesque (which involves torture such as amputation and eye-gouging) is said by the BBFC (British Board of Film Classification) that the film features sexual sadism. It said that giving the film a rating would involve a "risk of harm" to those viewing it. So, in other words - Selling or supplying the film would now be illegal! The decision was taken by BBFC director, David Cooke and senior colleagues.

The board said the majority of the film focused on the assault, humiliation and torture of two victims. The main character takes them prisoner, restrains, strips and sexually assaults them before inflicting horrific injuries until they die. This is truly ridiculous!

Wednesday, August 19, 2009

REVIEW: Chainsaw Cheerleaders (2008)

Title: Chainsaw Cheerleaders
Also known as: N/A
Year: 2008
Genre: Comedy / Horror / Independent
Language: English
Runtime: 88 min
Director: Donald Farmer
Writer: Donald Farmer

Dawn is a 17 year old rebelling girl, who just found out her boyfriend has been dating behind her back. When things just continue to go bad, her rage makes her parents sick of he, so they send her off to become a cheerleader. When trying to fit in with the other girls, things seem to be going worse. A witch travels 500 years, to our time, and possesses one of the other cheerleaders, and soon Dawn is the only one who can stop the witch.

Our thoughts:
I've been waiting a long time for this film and I finally got my hands on it. From the title, you pretty much know what to except, 'cause I can't really remember a film that has had "cheerleader" in the title, and hasn't been a cheesy trash cinema. "Chainsaw Cheerleaders" is exactly that.

Plotwise it's interesting at times. Donald Farmer clearly put some thought into it, but most of the time the plot is either too out there, or our mind drifts away so we can't concentrate on anything else than the pictures on the screen rather than dialogue and explainations. The film starts off with scenes from year 1508, and I've always had a bit of a problem with low budget films having scenes showing old times. Luckily there isn't much focus on getting the "feel" of 1508, except for the clothes they were wearing, so it's not hard for it to be believable enough. When we're back to our time, we follow Dawn's little journey to becoming a..well, chainsawing cheerleader. It takes about an hour before the film starts to let out a notable amount of nudity and blood, and I guess that's both good and bad. The film was alot more funny before it all started, but then again it got a bit more entertaining when we get some blood and titties. I guess I could weigh the pro's and con's of the two halfs of the film, but let's just say that both are needed for the film to work. Like I mentioned earlier, there were alot of times where I found myself thinking of anything but the film, while just looking at the moving pictures on my television. I found the film to drag a bit, and some things were just not needed in there. The thing that I liked the most in here would probably be the stereotypical cheerleaders and the stupid things that they say. There wasn't much more comedy than those scenes either really.

The film is very typical as far as ultra cheesy independent splatter comedies go, and if you're a fan of those, this is a perfect film for you. I used to be alot more into these films about 5 years ago or so, because now I always seem to be needing that little extra to truely enjoy them, which I didn't find in this one. Like how "Bone Sickness" has awesome zombies and tons of splatter, but still being about as independent and at times cheesy as "Chainsaw Cheerleaders" is. Technical flaws like how the chainsaws are never really on in the film, or that we in a throat cutting scene can see that there's no actual cut, aren't the biggest flaws in the film at all. The problem was just that it didn't pull me in enough, and the jokes were too few or just not my taste.

Positive things:
- The stupid cheerleaders gave me a few giggles.
- Decent CGI for what it is.
- Pretty girls.
- Boobies. This never stops being a positive thing in my reviews.
- Atleast it stands above films like "TrashHouse". Not much comfort, but it's something.

Negative things:
- Did the leading girl really have to be such a typical "goth" girl? If they were gonna make her goth, couldn't they have let her be a real goth rather than a poor-black-make-up-and-Marilyn Manson-listening-goth?
- Not funny or special enough.

Gore: 1.5/5
Nudity: 2/5
Story: 3/5
Effects: 1.5/5
Comedy: 3/5

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Saturday, August 15, 2009

NEWS: £45 zombie movie gets UK cinema release

The zombie film Colin made for a total of £45 (yupp, you heard me) is being launched in UK cinemas days ahead of its DVD release.

Colin is written and directed by first-time filmmaker Marc Price, and are a horror film penned over three months during his job at a London courier firm, The Guardian reports.

He says: "I had been a fan of Romero's films but I didn't have the money to copy them. I knew my only hope was to find a new angle. Then it hit me: why not do a movie from the point of view of a zombie? We went on Facebook and MySpace and said, 'Who wants to be a zombie?' We managed to get 50 brilliantly made-up zombies and stuff them into a living room. The lead character is named after my dad. He is a steelworker and it was his love of movies that first inspired me to think about making films."

Colin was shot on borrowed equipment and recovered tapes before being shown at Cannes, leading to a distribution deal and its upcoming nationwide release on October 23.

See the trailer here!

Tuesday, August 11, 2009

REVIEW: Guinea Pig: Devil's Experiment (1985)

Title: Guinea Pig: Devil's Experiment
Also known as:
Guinea Pig
Za ginipiggu: Akuma no jikken
Year: 1985
Genre: Torture / Fake Snuff / Mockumentary
Language: Japanese
Runtime: 43 min
Director: Satoru Ogura
Writer: N/A

Three guys has a girl captured to perform experiments in the form of torture on her, to see how much her body and mind can take.

Our thoughts:
This movie is all about torture, there is no plot, and there is nothing else happening what so ever. And hey, I'm not complaining! The experiments that are performed are very cruel and the perpetrators show no mercy. Some of the experiments they do on her is hitting her face with their hands, hitting her with a bag of coins, pinching her skin with a claw till it turns blue, pulling off nails and playing extremely loud noises in headphones for 20 hours,
to name a few. But none of those can compare to the final scene; the infamous needle scene.

It's obvious that this short film is made to shock, and that they worked hard to make it look realistic. While it does shock at times, there are a few scenes that feel very unrealistic. There are two things that comes to mind when I'm talking about it's realism. The first one is that the girl truely sucks at making screams sound real, most of the times they just sound stupid. The second one is the fact that the movie is filmed in different angles. Luckily, the shock value in this movie often works even with those flaws dragging it down. There are scenes that look close to a 100% real too, especially the needle scene I mentioned above. Gotta give the series some credits since it got Charlie Sheen to believe it ("Flower Of Flesh And Blood") was real, so he tried to sue. Of course he failed.

I don't have alot more to say about this movie, because there isn't much more to it, but every review needs a few final words, so here they are.
Alot of people didn't like this movie because they expected much more, so my advice is that if you are going to check this out, don't buy into all the rumors. This movie won't make you sick, but there is violent enough things in it to make you feel dirty. Don't watch this movie if you want gore, watch the second Guinea Pig movie instead, titled "Guinea Pig: Flowers Of Flesh And Blood".

Positive things:
- Does what it was made to do.
- Nice effects.
- Very good ideas on how to torture a person.
- The needle scene. I just love it.

Negative things:
- The girl.
- Several camera angles.
- The guts experiment. It was just ridiculous.
- Gets boring at times.

Gore: 2/5
Nudity: 0/5
Story: 0.5/5
Effects: 3.5/5
Comedy: 0/5

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Sunday, August 9, 2009

REVIEW: Gorotica (1993)

Title: Gorotica
Also known as: Wake Of The Dead
Year: 1993
Genre: Independent / Necrophilia / Crime
Language: English
Runtime: 60 min
Director: Hugh Gallagher
Writer: Hugh Gallagher

One of two bank robbers swallows a stolen diamond and then gets killed. Then the other robber, Neil, takes the body to a cemetery, where he happens to meet Carrie. Carrie helps him leave before the cops can get him. Carrie happens to be a necrophile who starts to screw around with his dead friend, and he tries to convince the people who hired them that the diamond is in a safe place.

Our thoughts:
What can you expect from a film that starts out with a girl who touches herself while watching death photos on the TV? You can expect a good time, that's for sure! I love sick low budget films, and while this might not have the most exciting plot and it's not overly gory, it's still obscure enough to appeal to a sickophant like man.

I think what kept me hooked the entire film was the introduction scene where she does that. Why? Well, frankly, because it was a fairly hot scene. The movie continues by following the two bank robbers, Neil and Max, who has just robbed a bank for a large diamond. As they try to hide from the cops, Max comes up with the oh so brilliant idea that he should swallow the diamond, because then they can just walk down the streets like nothing. So he does that, but gets shot to death the second after. Neil eventually ends up with the body at Carrie's apartment. Carrie is the introduction girl, the necrophile, and probably the thing that keeps the film interesting. It doesn't take long before she starts to mess around with the body (that they currently are keeping in the bathtub). Even this time it's pretty hot. I might not be a fan of her sacky boobs, but she's a decent actress and makes the scene work. Back to Neil, who is trying to contact the people who hired him to steal the diamond. He tries to get some money out of them in advance to travel. And that's basicly what this film is, a criminal / necrophile film. A nice and odd mix that I think worked great. There's room for improvment, plenty of room, but it has enough to never be boring, and like I said, the plot mix works great. Take either away from the other and you're looking at a pretty damn boring film.

What really puts this film into a category of it's own as far as ultra cheap trashy shot-on-video films goes is the acting. It's surprisingly well acted. Of course, you need to compare it with other films like this for it to really shine, but I think it could beat some of the classic horror films we all grew up with. Let's face it, they don't always have great acting. I know that one of my all time favorites, "Demons", has some terrible acting.

And then we have the special effects. We sadly don't have buckets of intestines and blood. There's not too much gore, but what we have looks fine. Especially on a crappy quality bootleg like this. We also have some great looking corpses. People made up as corpses, to be exact. Even the actors who are playing dead in this film are good, and I think this is what makes the necrophile scenes so good, if that's the right thing to call it. I can't help but compare necrophile films with the mother of necrophile films, "Nekromantik", and that's the case here too. The scene in the bathtub especially reminded me of some scenes in that and the sequel. If you like "Nekromantik", you should enjoy these scenes too.

I try not to judge films like these too hard, because you kinda know what you're gonna get when you sit down to watch them. In this case, even being a little judgemental can make this stand as a pretty cool obscure flick. It's raw, dirty, erotic, fairly sexy, and the plot might not impress but it kept me interested. If your favorite film is "Cloverfield" and the sickest film you know is "Saw", then yeah, skip this one. This film shouldn't be watched by some spoiled little brat like you. If you enjoy "Nekromantik", or just any extreme film, maybe even just classics like "Maniac", give it a shot.

Positive things:
- Great acting for being what it is.
- Yes, I thought some of the scenes were pretty sexy.

Negative things:
- Could've been gorier.
- She had sort of sacky tits.

Gore: 1/5
Nudity: 3/5
Story: 2/5
Effects: 3/5
Comedy: 1/5

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Saturday, August 8, 2009

REVIEW: Special Dead (2006)

Title: Special Dead
Also Known As: N/A
Year: 2006
Genre: Horror / Comedy / Zombie / Tardsploitation
Language: English
Runtime: 90 min
Director: Thomas L. Phillips, Sean Simmons
Writer: Jared Tweedie

When a zombie plague infects Camp Special Dude, a dude ranch for the mentally handicapped, a ragtag band of campers and counselors struggles to survive the night. Led by the indifferent, nunchuck-wielding head counselor, Mac Stone (Jason Brubaker), and his wheelchair-bound sister Dale (Gia Natale), the unlikely heroes fight their way off the mountain as, one by one, they’re picked off and join the ranks of the walking dead.

It’s a campy stampede of blood, boobs and gore as some “very special” people show that they can kick some serious undead ass.

Our thoughts:
What’s better than a movie filled with mentally challenged zombies? Nothing, that’s what.

“Well what about…”

No! Don’t argue with me, you’ll lose.

Any movie that has a zombie screaming profanities while it tears into flesh because of turrets, is an instant classic. This movie is the definitive argument for those who say there are no original ideas left, not only does it provide a unique situation of having the characters be a group of handicapped teens. It also provides a fresh idea into the zombie mythology by having water be the source of the outbreak. Don't start freaking out, I didn't spoil anything for you, you find this out within the first few minutes of the movie.

The thing that really makes this movie shine is its sense of humor. Once again, a movie that lets the absurdity of the idea be the joke, sure the movie gets silly and has its ridiculous moments, but it isn't being campy for the sake of being campy. The creators of "Special Dead", handle the humor of having mentally-challenged characters correctly, this isn't a one-note joke for 90 minutes. Instead the movie treats them as if they were no different from any other kids at camp, though they do use the unique setup to provide for some more humorous situations. Such as having one of the kids do an impersonation of someone who is really retarded, or when an urban gangster accidentally shows up at the camp, no one questions about him being there.

As far as blood goes, by my standards I really don't consider this to be a gory movie. Don't worry though, there is plenty of blood to go around. There are at least two decapitations, some guts here and there, but the blood comes in by the buckets, which should be enough to satisfy any horror fan. Oh yes, there is also plenty of zombie action going on here. It does take its time setting up the story and the characters in the beginning, but once those zombies hit the camp, the action doesn't stop until the very end. With the zombie scenes you are given the best of both worlds, you get the classic style of zombies popping out of the dark, and some humorous situations with them too. Have any other characters in a zombie movie, ever thought of throwing a bucket of blood and chicken guts on a zombie, so all the other zombies go after that one? No? Well these kids sure did.

All in all, an absolute gem in the low budget horror-comedy world. It has a good story, zombies, blood and some decent acting, which will provide enough entertainment for an individual or a room full of people who'll be spouting off quotes for days. Most importantly though, "Special Dead" answers a question that has been asked since the beginning of time. If two women get into a cat fight, and start wrestling each other, is it still hot if one of them is a zombie?

Yes. Yes it is.

Positive things:
- A unique concept with excellent execution.
- Surprisingly, has some good to decent acting.
- Everything a horror movie needs; zombies, blood and boobs.
- Lots of memorable lines.
- Does a zombie shit in the woods?

Negative things:
- The movie takes place at night so unfortunately somethings become hard to see with the lack of lighting.

Gore: 3/5
Nudity: 1/5
Story: 5/5
Effects: 3/5
Comedy: 5/5

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